Monday, May 4, 2009

~coNfeSsi0N 0F a c0upLeph0bia~

i've been in love before. it's sweet. it's nice. it's beautiful. it's the most happiest moment in my life. let me tell you my love story.

i've fall in love with this one guy. i love this guy so much. i loved him more than i love myself. i think this is my first time i'm falling in love way too much. he just one ordinary guy to you all. but for me, he is my first love until today. i cannot forget him no matter how hard i tried to. i cannot hate him no matter how hard he tried to make me hate him. i cannot lied to myself anymore that i'm totally cannot forget hi
m until now. i know that now he's in love with someone else, but, i still cannot forget about him.

dulu, dia memang bf ku. sangat cinta. sangat sayang. i'm totally happy being with him even we are in a long distance love because i lived in kL and he lived in silverstate. but, for us, bende 2 bukan susah pun. as long as we trust each other, then it's okie la. he loved me so much sampaikan die sanggup turun kL. yg penting, die surprisekan aq. aq xtaw pun die nak datang kL. yg aq taw, cousin aq ajak aq pergi kLcc n then i notice that he was beside me in the KINOKUNIYA. haha~~surprised!! thank you so much sayang! i love that moment a lot. i still can remember the way he holding my hand, the way he hugging me before he went back to silverstate. god! i'm crying right now~ hurm..

but right now, he's not mine anymore. why? because i left him again. why? sebab jodoh aq dan dia Tuhan kate xde. jdi, kami pun putus tgah jlan. until now i don't know what happen to him. it's not that i didn't want to know about him, it's just dia yg xnak aq taw pasal die. so, why must i'm waiting and looking for him anymore? right?? so, i just let him go.
but i want him to know that my love for him is true and i didn't lie when i said i love him so much when we were together. if you reading this, i just wanna be ur friend. that's it. not more than that cause i'm afaid that i'm going to hurt your heart n my heart too.

since then, i don't believe in love anymore. i'm becoming a couplephobia person. haha~
tgk kawan-kawan aq yg bercouple tu asyik bergaduh je,
tgk mak ayah ku yang da kawin tue asyik bertekak tak abes2,
tgk kawan lelaki aq ade yg suke maen perasaan pempuan tak suda-suda,
makes me doesn't believe more about LOVE + COUPLE until today...
i'm sorry.